Maternally Challenged

A Handy Dandy Reference Guide

 This is blatant self-promotion, but I confess to being slightly agog at the number of mentions that The Book (The Ghost in the House: Motherhood, Raising Children and Struggling with Depression) is creating in the blogosphere. Since I don't have time to do anything else today, here's a list of who's saying what:

http://spyderkl.net/?p=175
http://jbjones.blogspot.com/2006/08/i-wouldbut-i-cant.html
http://www.amalah.com/amalah/2006/08/blog_interrupte.html
http://www.blogsheroes.com/feed/parentinganddepression
http://thismodernworld.com/3069
http://fortherecord.wordpress.com/2006/08/15/dear-dooce/
http://inneedofgrace.blogsome.com/2006/08/16/dooce-reviews-book-about-maternal-depression/
http://www.hipmama.com/node/24153
http://wakingupastonished.blogspot.com/2006/08/so.html
http://orangeconezone.wordpress.com/2006/08/15/more-on-that/

http://jujubeejenny.typepad.com/my_weblog/2006/08/skip_right_on_o.html
http://limberlime.com/2006/08/13/maternal-depression-irritability-and-guilt/
http://welborn.blogspot.com/2006/08/ghost-in-this-house.html

And, just so nobody thinks I'm sitting here smoking Gauloises in my Chanel suit while fielding offers from film agents, here's how I have spent my day:

5 loads of laundry
dealing with three force-five swivets/ screaming hissy fits from the 9 year old
one screaming hissy fit of my own
trying, unsuccessfully, to get the 5 year old to nap
breaking up about 8 full-bore screaming sibling fights
packing for a trip to Wisconsin loooong before the crack of dawn tomorrow

This, ladies, is the reason Jane Austen never married.

Oh, yeah, and last item:
eating prunes to cure my constipation (Dooce, are you listening? Prunes, honey. Prunes are the cure.)

Proustian Questions

Recently, Her Bad Mother , a.k.a. Catherine Connors, asked some Proustian questions about blogging, which I will now attempt to answer:

1) What is the quality you most admire in a blogger?

They gotta make me laugh. Or maybe cry. But mostly I am looking for a laugh.

2) What is your most marked blogging characteristic (or, how would you describe your blog)?

Hard to say. I've been keeping a journal in some form or other since I was 14. So this seems very familiar. I just have to remember to keep my kids' real names out of it, is all.

3) What is your greatest virtue as a blogger (what do you most like about your blog)?

I try to say things other people are thinking but don't dare to say. Or, alternatively, make people laugh.

4) What do you regard as the principle defect of your blog?

Too much about me, not enough about current events. Which are truly frightening, so much so that I'd rather cover my ears and yell "Nyah Nyah Nyah!"--so, as you can see, I have trouble sticking to my goal.

5) What character of fiction do you most wish had a blog?

I would change this question to "what character in history," and my answer would be Elizabeth I. I used to be her, you know. Others have made this claim, but they are all con artists. I am the genuwine article.

6) What [other] historical or real life person do you most wish had a blog?

George W. Bush, because I truly do not understand how that man thinks. I mean, something must be goin' on in there, but I'm damned if I can figure out what it is. My best guess is that it is a looping re-run of "Animal House," which probably reminds him of his own days at Yale. He was not the John Belushi character, but wishes he was.

7) What is your present state of blog (present state of mind as a blogger)?

Bemusement. What will we all do with ourselves when Peak Oil hits and the generators go down and the batteries run out?

8) What is your blog motto?

"It's a weird fuckin' world, ain't it?" No, I'm sorry--my real motto is "They say children will drive you crazy. But what if you're already there?" It's either that or "Sisterhood is powerful. Motherhood is nuclear." I forget.
 

9. What do I regard as the lowest depth of misery?

Mental illness, which I know a little too much about. But then, I've never had to go grocery shopping in Beirut while the bombs are falling, so I could be wrong about this.

10. What is your idea of earthly happiness?

Well, at the moment, since I'm feeling kinda puny and have been up coughing all night, it would be lying in the warm sun in a hammock with a syringe of Darvon at hand. But I am trying to cultivate healthier habits. Actually, marveling at my children's beauty is a pretty good pastime.