Yesterday I was at the pediatrician's office with my 12-year-old daughter, who had a sore throat. While we were waiting, I watched two other moms in the waiting room. One had a three-year-old daughter; the other had a three-year-old son (I overheard them comparing ages), plus a baby sleeping in her arms who was six months old. There was nothing out of the ordinary about this encounter; these were just two moms shepherding their kids through the pediatrician's waiting room. But in the space of 15 minutes, I saw one or both of these women
- teaching a child how to use the toilet
- teaching a child how to keep his voice down and behave in a public space
- teaching a child how to share toys
- teaching a child that he/she must say "excuse me" when stepping on a stranger's foot
- swapping information with another mother on caring for a baby with a cold
- collaborating with another mother on discipline
- teaching a child that his actions have consequences (i.e. that if he does not behave himself, he will not get an expected playdate later in the day)
- encouraging a child to develop his physical coordination (using toys in the waiting room)
- attending to the child's physical needs (by being at the doctor's in the first place)
- answering a cellphone call
- retrieving a child's favorite toy from a back pocket, where she had thought to stash it in case of boredom
None of this was remarkable; it's what all mothers of most young children do. And in our society, they call this "not working."
